It doesn’t matter whether you love your job or simply turn up every day for the money. The simple truth is there will always be someone that would like you to make decisions and take actions that favour them. You need to be able to understand when you are being manipulated and whether you want to allow it to happen.
After all, sometimes your actions may help others and still be beneficial to you. In other cases, you are simply being used. Realizing this can often result in you wanting to quit. But, before you do, make sure you speak to your employment lawyers and quit in the right way.
What Is Manipulation At Work?
The simplest way to describe manipulation in the workplace e is when the situation is engineered to ensure you give a specific response or take a specific action. The aim may be to benefit the company or other employees. But, even if the intent is noble, the simple truth is that it’s being hidden from you.
Anyone that needs your help and begs or orders you to make certain decisions is being open about their intent. But, if they are keeping it hidden it’s manipulative and you don’t know what the end game is going to be.
Top Signs You’re Being Manipulated
The major issue when being manipulated is to recognize it. After all, you probably like your work and your colleagues. That means you’ll want to help them and do what’s best for them. Unfortunately, while this often works, it’s very easy for a manipulator to take advantage of your desire to please and look after others.
- Special Opportunities
Take a moment to look at how often you are presented with special opportunities, that’s options everyone else isn‘t getting. It can be sharing confidential information or giving you access to features reserved for high-level management.
If you’re getting things others aren’t, there is a good chance you’re being manipulated.
- Guilt Trips
One of the easiest ways to get someone to do something is to make them feel guilty. Manipulators are excellent at doing this. If you decline a request, they will make you feel like they are personally wounded or suffer because of your decision. But, ultimately, you will relent and follow the path they want you to.
- Gaslighting
Yes, this can happen as easily in the workplace as at home. Your manipulator will cause you to doubt your sanity. The simplest approach is to question your decisions, it will ultimately lead you to ask your choices, and this can cause a loss of confidence,
It’s also common for the manipulator to create alternative versions of events, leading you to question whether your memory is working properly.
- Comfort Levels
In general, you should feel comfortable working and chat with your colleagues. However, if one person makes you feel uncomfortable every time you see them, then there is a good chance they are manipulating you. Your lack of comfort stems from an unconscious knowledge that they will get you to do what they want, even if you know it’s not the best course of action.
Dealing With The Manipulator
Identifying that you are being manipulated and who is doing it is an important first step. But, you now need to be able to deal with them. The most effective approach is to ask more questions when they try to get you to answer in a specific way.
Focus on staying calm and asking as many extra questions as needed. Then, broaden your approach by asking them how it fits current protocols.
It’s also a good idea to talk with the colleagues you trust and bond together. This can help prevent the manipulator from manipulating others.
It takes time and patience, but you can stop a manipulator and feel better.
